Growth Friends - Who to Keep

"You can never have too much friends."  This was definitely my mentality when I got into USC. Goal? Make as much friends as possible, make sure they all fall in love with me, keep in touch with them after graduation, attend their wedding and baby shower.

As ideal as it sounds, it is far from the truth. I was in a social sorority in college and now I barely speak to 3-4 girls from the organization--one of them being my little sisses.

My best friend worded it perfect: To be a good friend, you need to stay true to your word and be present for your friends. But as you get older, you realize that having friends isn't a numbers game because you're only capable of giving your time to a select few because of their contributions and value in your life. So it begs the question, how much time can you really give to others for it to be beneficial enough to keep a relationship meaningful, while still staying true to yourself?

This is perhaps the question that all of us are bound to ask, including me. I've lost plenty of so-called "good friends" throughout the years and while I've spent months and even years lamenting on the loss of such valuable connections, I've finally come to terms with it on my own.

Nowadays, it's a matter of, "Can I really see you in my life?" "Can we grow together?" "Do we challenge each other?" The more questions I started to ask, the more people I began to slowly stray away from. Although I started out with more friends than I could possibly keep track of, I figured it's about time that I focus on the growth ones. If you want to know what I'm referring to, feel free to check out this video of Brendon Burchard (a favorite of mine on YouTube, by the way) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ir0w3VPVi5Q He does an amazing job with categorizing the three types of friends you'll encounter in your lifetime.

It hasn't been the easiest battle, to say the least. I used to despise the act of 'letting go' but now I've trained myself to see the good in it. Letting go is now more about giving myself the freedom to move forward and move on and as cliché as it may sound, if it's meant to be, it'll be.

Yesterday, I took some time to reevaluate the people who are currently present in my life. Some are busy focusing on their career, but we still manage to keep in touch via text from time to time. Some are completely out of my friend circle and I'll probably never hear from them ever again. Of course, there are a select few who continues to shower me with love and consideration--all of which, I have now narrowed it down to a select handful. I'm more than happy with my avid choice. It has made life all the more uplifting and stressful, now that I know who is worth it and who isn't.

Khanh P. Duong

Based in Southern California, Khanh P. Duong is a bilingual female Vietnamese MC and host for weddings and special events. She is also a digital tech specialists and host of Khanhcast. 

http://www.khanhpduong.com
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